The Wasteland
News, notes, rants and raves from Lake Havasu City

Feb
28

Bunghole kills dog, daughter

Some a**hole in Erie, Pa., got pissed off because his dog crapped on the floor, so he kicked the dog to death then killed his 5-month-old daughter because she wouldn’t stop crying. What the hell is wrong with people these days? Full story here.

Woman breast feeds, talks on phone while driving

Boy, some people are just idiots. A woman has been charged with child endangerment after being accused on talking on the phone and breast feeding while driving. Click here for the story.

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Feb
27

At the suggestion of Today’s News-Herald features editor Pam Ashley, I’m starting a new regular feature here at The Wasteland called ‘That’s Messed Up’. These entries will feature things that are outrageous, unbelievable, shocking and, well, just plain messed up. I will try to post at least a couple of these  a week.

So, to start off here are two stories reported by the AP in the past couple of days:

Good Samaritan Busted

On Feb. 20, Denver man Jim Moffett, a truck driver, stopped in the middle of snow storm to help three little old laddies cross the street. Moffett noticed a pickup truck headed right for them and pushed the elderly women out of the way, taking the hit from the truck himself and sustaining serious injuries. So the guy wakes up in the hospital with bleeding in the brain, broken bones, a dislocated shoulder and a possible ruptured spleen, and is informed that he has been cited for jaywalking. Unbelievable. Read the whole story here.

Lady trades her kids for a bird

Donna Greenwall, of New Orleans, traded her two children for a pet cockatoo and $175 in cash. She originally asked for $2,000, but when the childless couple she was soliciting said they couldn’t afford it, she gladly took the bird instead. Greenwall has been arrested and charged with kidnapping. Full story here.

Feb
16

 

UFO photo submitted by reader Kelly.

UFO photo submitted by reader Kelly.

OK, I’m an idiot. In the UFO photo that reader Kelly submitted a while back, I accidentally cropped the wrong object in the photo. I thought that UFO looked suspiciously like the moon. So here is the real photo. Much creepier. Thanks Kelly.

Also, I ran across this video of a UFO sighting in Lake Havasu City last month. Just thought I’d share.

Feb
16

 

Chuck Taylor All-Stars — The white man's moccasin

Chuck Taylor All-Stars — The white man's moccasin

Converse Chuck Taylor All-Stars. The most popular shoe in the history of America, and my personal favorite. I’ve been wearing them since I was a teenager and I refuse to wear anything else, unless I’m at work where sneakers are not allowed. So when my girlfriend Liz told me she was going to order me a custom pair from the Converse Web site as a Valentine’s Day gift, I was way excited.

 

The site allows you to customize EVERYTHING about your shoes. You can change the pattern inside and out, the laces, the stitching, the racing stripe. ANYTHING. You can even add a custom embroidered ID tag on either the heel or the side of the shoe. This is where we ran into a problem. I spent 10 or 15 minutes creating my shoes. Black Chucks with a skull pattern on the tongue, black laces, and red cheetah pattern on the inside. Then the last step. I try to add my name as my custom ID tag and receive an error message reading: “That won’t fly! (Nothing you wouldn’t say to your mother)”. What?!?! I was unaware that my name was a curse word.

We toyed around with the site for a few minutes trying to get around the problem. We tried starting over again from scratch. That didn’t work. We tried using all capital letters. That didn’t work. I tried using my full name: Luke Phillips. That didn’t work. It wouldn’t even let me use Luke P.

So Liz calls up customer service to find out why I can’t put my own name on my shoes, and we are informed that we can’t use the name Luke because it has been trademarked. By Luke Perry. My jaw hit the floor! ” That’s the stupidest, most fu**ed up thing I’ve ever heard!” I screamed. 

I’m still in shock. I’ve written my name thousands of times in my life, so I probably owe Mr. Perry a huge chunk of change by now. I hope he doesn’t sue me.

So I guess I’ll have to settle for having my initials on my new sneakers, or my last name only. I’m still pretty pissed off about the whole thing. This quote from Mike Bolton in the movie “Office Space” sums up my feelings pretty well: “Why should I change my name? He’s the one who sucks”.

Feb
01
I really need to buy this shirt

So Super Bowl time is here again. Almost everyone I know has football fever and is eagerly awaiting the big game. I’ve already been asked several times who I favor: The Arizona Cardinals or the Pittsburgh Steelers. My answer is invariably the same: I don’t know and I don’t care. 

 I enjoyed playing baseball as a kid (and still like to play catch every now and then), I was on the volleyball and track and field team in Junior High, and I still jump at the chance to shoot hoops, but I never understood watching sports on TV. Why in God’s name would I want to watch other people play a game? Would you willingly sit and watch as others played a game of Clue or Monopoly? Do you get a kick out of watching other people play volleyball or frisbee on the beach? I think not. Because what good is it if you can’t join in the fun?

So why do people watch sports? The answer I most often hear is “Because I enjoy cheering on my team!”. Why?!?! The players on the teams are in a constant state of flux, coming and going (or changing teams) all the time. So, essentially, you’re cheering for the clothes the players are wearing.

And football is just the worst. Some sports I can almost understand. At least it takes some finesse and intricate skills to play baseball or golf or basketball. But football is basically two dudes playing catch while two groups of thugs line up and run into each other over and over again in between them. Big whoop. 

And while we’re on the subject, I think the amount of money these people make to play games is absolutely obscene. Can’t we give this money to someone who actually helps people and makes a difference in society. How about we switch the salaries of football players and teachers. Then we’ll see how many of the actually do it for the love of the game.

To each his own I guess, but I for one will not be watching the Super Bowl on Sunday. The only thing I can think of that I would actually enjoy less would be watching a NASCAR race. But that’s a subject for another entry.

P.S.: For people who feel the same as I do, check out this website: www.football-sucks.com.

Jan
25

Wasteland reader ‘Kelly’ shares the story of her UFO sighting:

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UFO photo submitted by Wasteland reader

Last night my son came screaming in my bedroom about 12:30am….stating he had just saw a UFO outside his bedroom window. When i had gotten out of bed we went out front and to my disbeilief saw numerous aircrafts in the sky. All we could see were Blinking red lights flying above us, there had to be at LEAST 12 flying objects. We stood out there for almost an hour taking pictures till they all seemed to dissapear. My son was on the phone with several of his friends during this time and his friends actually saw one go down behind the lake. we called the police department but no one had called in these sitings . so i just wanted you to know that we saw something. dont know what. but i dont think Lake Havasu wouldnt of had a dozen planes flying over us last night so close together in air space ………so go figure!

Do you have photos of unexplained objects spotted in the skies of Lake Havasu? Please send them to lphillips@havasunews.com.

Thanks to Kelly for the photo!

Jan
10

News-Herald reporter Jayne Hanson relates her experience of covering the Havasu UFOs here. Make sure you visit her wonderful blog ‘Beyond Deadline.’ Good stuff.

Jan
08
Jan
05

ufo-web11

Ever since I moved to Lake Havasu City a couple of years ago, UFO sightings have become a regular occurrence for me. My friends, co-workers and I often see unexplained things in the skies, but only last week was I lucky enough to have my camera with me during one of these sightings. 

I was out taking pictures of the London Bridge and the Christmas lights around the London Bridge Resort at about 1:30 a.m. (I know that’s kind of weird, but what can I say, I’m a night owl). I was walking near the front entrance to the resort when I noticed an orange light moving slowly across the southern sky, over the mountains. I zoomed in as close as I could and snapped a photo. This is when things got weird.

ufo3-web

As soon as I took the photo, my camera shut down. Now keep in mind: I had been taking photos for about an hour and the camera was working fine. I even had a fresh set of batteries. I turned the camera back on, rezoomed, and took another photo. Again, the camera shut down. I repeated the process a couple more times before the object moved behind a building and out of sight.

I kept looking for the object, but after a few minutes it was clear that I wouldn’t get another glimpse. So I went about my business of taking Christmas light photos, and the camera, again, was working fine.

After I got home, I downloaded the photos and to my surprise the object looked like anything but the orange dot that I saw with my bear eyes.

ufo2-web1

I cropped the photos closer and lightened them up a bit, and what emerged was beyond belief. A couple of the photos were too blurry to make out, but in one of them the object was clearly a disc-shaped ring of lights and in another the object had appeared to morph into a multi-colored, wormhole looking streak.

I promise these photos have not been doctored except for being lightened up a bit.

I’m still waiting for the Men in Black to come knocking on my door to confiscate my memory card.

Dec
21

jrolfe_avgn1

The Angry Video Game Nerd in action

If you were born in the early 80s like I was, Nintendo was probably a huge part of your childhood. Memories of hours plopped in front of the TV trying to beat ‘The Legend of Zelda’ or bouncing my way through another ‘Super Mario’ game were some of the most vivid and exciting I can recall — sad as that may seem to some people.
I got my first Nintendo Entertainment System for Christmas in 1988 and I’ve been hooked on gaming every since. Of course, I’ve moved on from my old 8-bit system to the modern marvels of X-Box, Playstation and the Wii, but those old games (Zelda, Mario, Excitebike, Contra, Tetris, Duck Hunt, Off-Road and The Adventures of Lolo, just to name a few) will always hold a special place in my heart.
But for as many good games as there were on the NES, there were also some really, really bad ones. I can’t even begin to describe my frustration at trying to get through ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’, or ‘Who Framed Roger Rabbit’. And now I don’t have to. I have the Angry Video Game Nerd to do it for me.
James Rolfe has been making online videos about these terrible old games since his 2004 review of ‘Castlevania II: Simon’s Quest’. He was originally dubbed the ‘Angry Nintendo Nerd’, but changed the name of the show to avoid trademark infringement and also because he began reviewing bad games on video game systems other than Nintendo.
The show has evolved from the first episodes, which were just screen shots of the game as Rolfe delivered a ranting narration, to a fully developed show  — often featuring characters from the games that show up to be assaulted by Rolfe in person.
The show features Rolfe’s insightful and well-thought-out, but also rage-filled and obscenity-laced descriptions of exactly what made these games so awful. Followed by the obligatory destruction of the offending game cartridge.
The whole process is very cathartic for the 10-year-old inside me, and if you’ve also grown up holding onto the rage instilled by bad video games, it might be good for you too.
You can check out Angry Video Game Nerd videos here. The videos are usually released once or twice a month, but be warned: They are for MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY. Your children should not be in the same room, or even within earshot when you watch these videos. They may be traumatized for life.